What this nation needs it more ECONOMISTS and less ECONOMARXISTS
every time someone tells me to “calm down” i get 10% more powerful and 15% more unhinged. this is basic math. this is economics
I’m an RSS maxi
JD stands for Junior Dictator, Vance stands for anything Peter Thiel wants whenever he wants it
day 456 of explaining to my family that being down 99.99% is actually good because “you can’t lose more than 100%.” they’re starting to suspect i don’t know how math works
just found out some lib wants companies to “pay living wages” and “not destroy the planet”… buddy this isnt your grandmas quilting circle.. this is CAPITALISM baby gets crushed by falling stock prices
“My parents spanked me and I turned out just fine” I mean no you didn’t you turned into a grown ass adult who wants to beat their kids how is that fine
If my indie publishing career doesn’t take off there are literally only three options:
- Get a job (bold of me to think I’m employable)
- Start a think tank (only for the caffeine and clout)
- Become the conservative right’s token trans woman ($$$??)
Publishing, please pull through.
The difference between progressives and conservatives is that progressives can laugh at themselves but conservatives can only laugh at other people
everyone keeps saying “wow.. your so brave for speaking truth to power” but trust me the second peter thiel waves a $2000 amex gift card at me im deleting every post faster than a roomba hitting dog shit
trying to donate my collection of 50,000 shitposts to the library of congress. “these are crucial historical documents” i say as security drags me out
my sleep paralysis demon trying to scare me but im just critiquing his form. pathetic. you call that a haunting? my grandma does scarier shit making lasagna
absolutely will not go to your open mic night. would rather get in a fist fight with every single bird at the zoo. the penguins have been talking shit anyway
“it’s like bitcoin but worse in every way” (receives 50 million in venture funding)
not many ppl know this but they actually made Lex Fridman in a lab by blending a stock photo of ‘guy thinking hard’ with the concept of a TED Talk nobody asked for
just had 3 ‘left-wing’ yoga moms tell me they’re voting for the ghost of Richard Nixon, while my buddy who listens to AM radio swears he’s writing in Scooby-Doo. absolutely no idea what it means for the country, but as a certified galaxy-brain thinker, i MUST announce it publicly
my roommate michael moore has started wearing his baseball cap in the shower. says he learned in detroit that “you never know when history will happen”
dear influencers the correct way to hold every mic is any way that makes it look like you’re clutching a dick
Chad LeBron vs Beta Cuck Bezos
“important update! To better serve our users and continue providing the best experience we can we’re taking away your favourite features and raising our prices and adding limits to how you can use our product look how much better served you are”